My suffering is offering me an opportunity to look for new ways of being fed. It’s reminding me that the places I habitually seek nourishment are barren, that I starve my soul trying to eat there.
Particularly in...
Other people’s opinion of me
Knowing I’m helping / how much “good” I’m doing.
Achievement
Status
Service
These things keep me feeling separate and hopeless because they’re all born of a belief in a separate self. To seek to be fulfilled by these things requires a belief in a separate (false) self that is not fulfilled and so are hopeless from the start, a belief that overlooks my fullness, calls it “empty” and then spurs me to frantically grasp at nothing in order to fill what does not need filling.
My soul will never feel filled this way.
My soul will never feel filled by anything outside myself because there is nothing for my soul outside myself.
Engaging “others” is a pursuit for the already-fulfilled: for those who recognize and accept their own inherent worthiness prior to any exterior measures of worth.
Spiritual nourishment can only be found in the recognition of my true nature, in love, in non-being, in not-knowing.
When I recognize that everything is me, that I can never be rejected because I am not separate, that everything is eternally as it should be, then I notice that I have everything I need and I can move through the world as an expression of complete wholeness.
When I am at one with everything, what opinion could ever truly oppose me? Who could I not be helping? What could I not be achieving? What status could I fail to attain? Who could I fail to serve?
When I forget this I become confused, I think I am empty and then I try to fill myself up with the very things that cause my starvation.
I am cultivating new habits of thought that reveal an eternally benevolent universe.
My suffering serves that effort by reminding me when I slip back into believing something that has never been true for me.
So I can return to the awareness of my inherent fullness, and be filled by that.