def. The recognition of innocence.
Forgiveness is not the endorsement of acts, it’s the recognition of innocence.
Every hurtful act carried out by a human being is the result of the limitations of their particular understanding and the honest belief that they’re doing what must be done.
All human beings are susceptible to this kind of confusion.
Consider a toddler saying something like “You’re ugly” or “Fuck you.”
When it comes from a toddler, it’s easier to see that a hurtful act is just someone’s best attempt at navigating the world as they see it. With a toddler, I can even giggle at it. It’s easier to grasp that, like all of us, they’re just doing the best they can with what they’re thinking and believing.
If my thoughts and beliefs differ from theirs, it stands to reason I will disagree with their actions. If I believed what they believe I would do just what they’re doing. And if I’m not awake to the true innocent nature of this disconnect, then I will be prone to experience their actions as evil. And when I do that, I suffer.
Forgiveness isn’t endorsing the act but being awake to the true nature of the disconnect. It’s recognizing that my innocent war with someone’s innocent act is the true source of my pain. It’s living in the awareness of our collective innocence.
So forgiveness isn’t so much a thing I do as it is a way of being in the world. It’s just moving through the world with the awareness that we are ALL innocently at the mercy of what we’re thinking and believing.
When I move through the world in forgiveness, I recognize innocence everywhere I look - including my own innocence - and I find the world to be very forgiving.
It’s not a question of morality or piety but of practicality: What kind of world do I want to experience? Do I want to experience a world with evil people plotting against each other or a world with innocent people doing their absolute best? Both are available to me. And I can certainly choose war, if I want it. But the only way to experience a kind world is to live in forgiveness. THAT is why I choose to do it (…when I do).
Most importantly, forgiveness does not mean liking, preferring, or seeking to sustain hurtful acts or leaving harm uncorrected. It just means that the actions I take to correct things when I’m living in forgiveness are far more effective at reaching the people I want to reach than they would be if was at war with them.
And it’s the only way I know to effectively establish and maintain a world I want to live in: