Okay me, listen up:
Accept the universe’s gifts. Just do it. Nothing else needs to be done.
The universe’s gifts cannot be earned nor can they be paid back. They’re for you. There are no accounts to settle. Everything is already balanced. Always. Because everything in the universe is one perfectly balanced thing born of eternal generosity.
The idea that something needs to be earned is confusion about what you have, what you don’t have and what you should have.
Everything is a gift: the “having” and the “not having.”
...which leaves no such thing as “should having.”